Pretty Quiet- Update.

I've been pretty quiet on the blog... amidst all of the amazing excitement of getting my book ready for print- my proofs arrive end of February- not sure I can wait, but alas... waiting is one thing I do well... for a time ;)


We are in Transition... transitions are hard, but exciting... and we've been here before, my brain says... "you've got this... we know how it goes", and my heart says, "Oh my gooooodness- why????". 
We are transitioning back to Canada... like forever? for a time? where in Canada? Canada is a big place... I have no answers.  

Amidst the transition, I'm dealing with some serious grief... it's overwhelming, it sweeps up and catching me off guard, like heat in my body, then tears... it has to do with feeling unsettled, babies, and realising that 40 is coming, and well we all know what we've been told about 40- it's all down hill from here... nice society, nice.  


Even though I am following a dream to write and illustrate, I am grieving a dream to be a mom...

I cannot explain how it feels, some of you know these feelings, and some of you don't. No matter how hard I try, I won't be able to explain these feelings, because I can barely figure them out for myself.

Through all this stuff... the tears, the fears, the excitement, the transition... I'm learning patience... still trusting, and still waiting. 

I wonder if waiting is the name of the game. 
I wonder if what matters is during the waiting-  

What we do in the waiting may be what is most important... do we let the waiting dictate the doing, or do we continue living / thriving in the waiting... How do we make sure that our attitudes are good, how do we make sure that our heart are soft and not hard... how to we ward off disappointments... how to we stay calm, and peaceful, when anxiety and fear of the unknown want to take over?

I'm living in the waiting, creating, working, dreaming, and believing that all will work out, and all will be well...

These words were shared with me this week, from Sarah Young's devotional, Dear Jesus:

"Bring me your restless heart, and wait while I speak peace into its depths - stilling the troubled waters of your soul.”

From the verse, Mark 4:39 "... Peace be still..."

I hope that wherever you are in your life... this speaks to you,
Share the love,
M.

©2018 LostBumblebee MDBN
Bible Mark 4:39
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Word before World

We are currently in big transition, we moved home to take a job that didn't end up panning out, which threw our end game right out the window, and now we are dealing with a whole new playbook, and a lot of 'what ifs'...

Transition isn't easy. Ever. I've lived an entire life of transition. When I was little my parents planted churches, we moved around, across Canada and back again, and now it seems that my own personal life hasn't been much different, except, I'm not planting churches. I do however, hope that I am planting positivity, and generating hope everywhere I go. To be completely honest, I know I am not always positive, and not always full of hope. I try, and sometimes my brain is saying, "come on Missie, you've got this, this isn't an issue, we know what we are doing", and my emotions are having a full on, level 10 melt down in aisle 6 of Walmart. That is life.

Our transition has brought us to my Dad and his wife's house- both of whom I love very much... but it isn't really my home. I wake up to CNN, I go to bed to CNN... guys I for years have avoided sensationalized news, basically listening only to the hourly (and not every hour on the hour... maybe once a day)  on the CBC radio in Canada because I felt they were at least semi moderate and trustworthy.  If that isn't enough to tell you how much all of this sensationalized news affects me, I dreamt about the Trump administration shenanigans the other night. It has infiltrated my dreams, Oi.

I do think it is important to keep up on what is happening in the world, but in all seriousness... there is an entire world that things are happening too,  and we have no idea, it's hidden underneath all of the chaos, half the time we don't even hear about it.  Yes, stay up to date on news and events... but also, we need a measuring stick, we need a breather, we need a True North, and we need Truth.

This print will be on my night stand (as soon as I take it to print, and get a little frame for it) as a reminder... Missie... Word before World. I need the Word in you to be able to stay on course, I need the quiet to be able to hear, I need time to process... I need the Word. I need to read my bible, not just my devotion every day (My Utmost for His Highest- By Oswald Chambers (you can buy on Amazon here) is this year's devotional, and so far I am loving it).

So if you are like me, in a year of transition, and honestly who isn't?! Then this little print might just be what you need to see this year...

Share the love,
M.

LostBumblebee ©2018 MDBN Word before World, | Personal Use Only |  Donate to download
www.lostbumblebee.net
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LostBumblebee ©2018 MDBN Word before World, | Personal Use Only |  Donate to download
www.lostbumblebee.net
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